Why can't I seem to come upfront with what I feel and what I ought to say? I sometimes find it difficult to articulate my own thoughts and feelings. So difficult meh?! A grip of fear overcame me earlier. Don't ask me to define that fear, I can't. Could be uncertainties, could be lack of confidence in what may happen, could be… honestly, I could not put a finger to it. Am I afraid to get out of my comfort zone? Am I afraid to face unemployment consequences? Am I afraid of being 'unsuccessful'? Haven't had fear overcome me for some time le. Feels… surreal. Reminds me of the times when I was younger, when I would stand by the side of the window late at night or earlier in the morning, paralyzed by sudden fear and terror, as if some calamity or catastrophe is about to befall me and the people around me. It's crazy, but maybe it's because I'm too tired. Really too tired le. I oughta skip the movie tonight to rest early but I really really wanna watch leh… hai…
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